I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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