Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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