tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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