that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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