I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
