I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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