So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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