after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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