My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
