He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
