did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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