I'm drive I can fine osifer
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Randomize
