Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
