At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
