just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
