the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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