i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
