what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
