I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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