so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
