what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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