Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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