if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
whose parrot is this?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Randomize
