woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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