Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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