we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I understand Curling. That high.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
