How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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