Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
