Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
