I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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