don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
