I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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