normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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