I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
