dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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