Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
