gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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