hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize
