If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
