There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
