A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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