Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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