awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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