u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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