i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
