i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
