Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
