the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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