this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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