Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
